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"Mother's Heart" by Laurie Justus Pace |
Jessie - Jesse
so desperately
I did want you to live
to be brought forth
into this world
my own existence became unimportant
with a joyful smile
I would have gladly have given my life
for yours
if doing so would have – could have, saved you
Jessie – Jesse
you flew away
in spite of my pleading, fervent prayers
unknowingly, I spoke into God's deaf ear
he, so stony and remote
who would not/did not hear me
I
was
lost
abandoned
sentenced to remain
empty
my womb
my soul
my mind
only the grief
multiplying daily
filled the space
as the sole
flourishing
green shoot
Jessie – Jesse
I so adored you
Inexplicably … as soon as I knew
that you grew within me
I had waited
many
long years
for you
Exultant thrill
sheer delight
in watching my belly grow
knowing you were strong
to feel your quickening
kicking
to hear your heartbeat
Jessie - Jesse
you came too early
could not survive
my beloved
wanted
beautiful baby
gone
I have missed you
every single day since
I still hold you close
here, in my heart
my very own
sweet, wonderful
Jessie - Jesse